How to Manage Negative Thoughts

NEGATIVE THOUGHTS

According to a team of psychology experts from Queen’s University in Canada, the average person has over 6,000 thoughts per day. Some might argue that we encounter far more thoughts than this; however, what tends to be more alarming is that regardless of what the exact number is, the majority of our thoughts are negative. But why is that??? Why are we spending so much time in negativity??? Experts refer to this as a negativity bias. The reason for this is that our brain is activated far more by negative stimuli than that of positive or neutral stimuli. Consider it evolutionary. Our brains want to protect us from all threats. It started as physical threats centuries ago, but now those threats have since evolved. By thinking negatively, our mind is tricking us into thinking that we can somehow protect ourselves if we prepare or accept the worst, the worst being a painful emotion. In some cases preparing for the worst can be helpful, but in every day situations this can lead to anxiety and depression, ultimately affecting our self confidence and how we interact with others. Just think about how much precious time we lose worrying or overthinking something that was said or that happened whether it was our doing or someone else’s. Think about how negatively infused the news is, yet it continues to significantly draw the attention of millions around the world, impacting us in more negative ways than positive, one of those negative outcomes is the production of fear. Think about when someone gives you a list of compliments but mentions one critique.. where does your focus automatically go? ––– the critique, of course! If you are wondering if something is wrong with you, the answer is NO. This is a human struggle, no one is completely immune, it is what we do about our thoughts that matter most.

The good news, your thoughts can improve with awareness and commitment to change!

AWARENESS and COMMITMENT

The first step in dealing with the combatting of thoughts is being aware of your thoughts. Be mindful of how many negative thoughts you may be having throughout the day. Use this awareness to commit to change.

Once you have realized that you may be dealing with a negativity bias. You must commit to adding positivity to your day. Each day we are given an opportunity (or challenge) to find something positive in ourselves, in others, and/or in our day. Write those positive things down or speak them out loud.

Negative thoughts may never stop but their level of impact can be managed greatly so that we do not allow them to become our primary focus, which ends up stealing our peace and joy that we desperately need to live wholistic lives.

TIP: If your thought is not rooted in any supporting evidence, than it is just a thought. There is no hidden meaning. It is just your mind trying to protect you from what you are subconsciously or consciously experiencing, which is a misperceived threat. What the threat is actually highlighting is that this event or person matters to you. Go deeper in exploring why your mind might be trying to protect you.

TIP: If your thought is rooted in supporting evidence, it may be a call to change or a need for self-compassion in order to move forward (in a healthy way). Change can be scary but has the potential of producing great outcomes in your life, and self compassion is hard to do at times, especially if you are your own worst critic, but it is essential to loving and believing in yourself. Either way both can be achievable goals in counseling.